What I’ve done is created a monster. A hateful resenting beast that forgives only itself. What I’ve allowed is my mind to slip to the recesses of where it has made a home in my far past.
A comfort zone is where I lay, paralyzed by hurt and instability. 3’s they come in 3’s, and what would life be like for everyone else if I laid down mine?
I wonder what everyone’s eulogy for me would consist of… I lay awake at night thinking hurtful thoughts… thoughts that only hurt me. Thoughts that may or may not be or have been but my mind finds comfort in my self inflicted pain. Things transpiring before my eyes as if I were there. Why? How? When? Who?
This monster laughs at my pain. If you could see me at any given moment right now you would see me smiling. I am not happy but I am smiling. If you intentionally hurt me right now you would see me smirk then a chilling grin and then a smile. It is my demon not me, for I am gone right now…
Leave a message and I may call you when I return.
– Jason Roberson